As part of SMM’s new addition to the new year, I have a segment called Simply Said where I feature other bloggers and select followers of SMM. Melissa from The Inspired Room is my first guest. She is the reason for the makeover of our master bedroom. She is an inspirational interior designer. Her site is full of marvelous advice and tips for the home. I asked her specifically to help me with a problem I had in my home… keeping the kids and their stuff out of our bedroom. A million thanks to Melissa for sharing her wisdom with us and encouraging me to makeover our bedroom.

I am so excited that Tiffany invited me to share a post on her blog. It was such fun awarding her the HomeGoods gift card and seeing how she has turned her bedroom into a lovely and peaceful retreat.

My husband and I have three children. Two of them have now flown the coup to college, but our 9 year old son is still at home. We’ve experienced all the challenges parents face in trying to keep their sanity while raising children, including how to create a peaceful master bedroom to retreat to as a couple at the end of a long day!

It can be difficult to justify time or money spent on a creating a master bedroom. Not only is it hard to justify it, it is hard to make it happen with kids underfoot! But after being married now for 23 years, I can say with certainty that it is not selfish at all to create a sanctuary for just the two of you! I think a healthy marriage between happy parents is one of the best gifts you can give your kids. If your kids are like mine, they have the run of the rest of the house and take up a lot of our available energy every day. But when we cross the threshold of our bedroom, we need to leave that chaos behind.

Think having a private retreat is an impossible goal right now? Think I don’t know YOUR CHILDREN or YOUR HUSBAND or YOUR HOME? Here are my top five tips that might help get you started, in spite of your own personal challenges!

1. Grab & Box Technique.

If your room is overrun by toys, electronics and piles of laundry, it most certainly won’t feel like a relaxing retreat! If your house is small or you have trouble keeping your room clutter free, here is my realistic suggestion for a quick solution: at the end of the day, right before dinner if you can manage it, do the ‘grab & box technique’ (a highly technical term I made up myself.)

Take a big box or laundry basket and gather up all the stray stuff that has made its way to your room and set it “somewhere else.” While you will still have the basket to deal with later, at least your room will feel clean and ready to unwind in at the end of a long day!

2. Chose Pretty.

Make your bedroom as inviting and beautiful to you as possible. Oftentimes as parents we spend so much money on bills, the kids or the rest of the house we neglect our own space. Pretty doesn’t have to be expensive, and honestly, an inexpensive but pretty room is always cheaper than therapy. Just sayin’.

3. Make Your Bed.

This is definitely a mom thing to say, but us moms need to follow our own advice! While it is a fairly simple suggestion, it is possibly the most beneficial step we can make in our goal of having a peaceful master retreat. Getting into the habit of making your bed in the morning will set the tone for the mood of the room. It will make you think twice before piling junk on the bed or around the room all day. It will remind you to keep the space sacred, and will hopefully remind the kids that this is not their personal flop house. A bed that is made and set up all pretty only takes a few moments of your day. Time well spent, I think!

4. Indulge your senses.

In the rest of the house, life tends to revolve around the needs of family. In your personal space, you deserve to be surrounded by everything YOU love. Think about what you want your room to feel like, smell like and look like. Light a candle, turn on a pretty lamp, snuggle in a soft blanket, open the windows for fresh air and breathe a sigh of relaxation. Whatever stage of child-rearing you are in, this is YOUR space– so indulge yourself and your senses.

5. Lock the door.

Once your kids are old enough, they can learn to knock on your closed door and wait for your response. Even if you are just reading a good book you deserve a place in your home where you can enjoy a few moments of peace away from the hustle and bustle of the outside world.

If you do not have a lock, I would encourage you to teach your kids about knocking and waiting until they have been invited in before entering. And even better, if you have kids old enough to read, make a sign for your door that reminds them that you are having a few moments to yourself. I know that isn’t really an option when kids are tiny, but once they enter grade school you can expect them to respect your privacy and stay out of trouble for a short while each day.

Having a master bedroom retreat is important for your sanity and good for your marriage — and those two things are a gift to your children! I know I am inspired by Tiffany’s bedroom makeover and her commitment to weekly date nights this year!

Thanks for allowing me to guest post!